no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
