it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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