Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Randomize
