Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Randomize