we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
