just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
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