we're blogging at a bar
ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
