I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
