Plan B is the new Plan A
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
