Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
