I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Is it penis luge time yet?
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
