What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
