New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
