isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
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