check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I deserve to be covered in dicks
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Randomize