I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
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