This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Come on in and take your pants off
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