ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Randomize
