You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Randomize
