I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
