Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
