So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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