They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
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