saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
