I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
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