I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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