oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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