Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
