i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
