my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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