There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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