you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
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