There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
