your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize
