there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
