Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Randomize
