Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
okay pat passed out under dana's car
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
from now on my penis is your penis
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Randomize
