She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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