She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
birth control should be required to get into college
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
