S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
