Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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