Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
