I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
