I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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