The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
you had me at cake vodka
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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