I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
