Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Randomize
