apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
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