If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Randomize
