At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Randomize
