Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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