Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Randomize
