He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I wish I could punch you in the face.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Randomize
